From the Horses Mouth...

Two posts ago, I said that I had a post brewing. I wasn't referring to the the last post (the quickie) but, rather, to this one. It has been brewing for a few weeks now. As I begin to write, I imagine this post being less polished, less pithy, and more ...stream-of-consciousness. We'll see. I wanna address the issue of socialization - or lack thereof - during training.
Let's rewind a few years. In high school, I could be found out and about at least 3-4 nights a week. Bed time was somewhere in the Midnight-1am range during the week and the 3-4 range on the weekends. In college, the concept of time pretty much went out the window. I was livin' it up 4-5 times a week and it really didn't matter what time it was - save for when I was at work, school, or rehearsal. My friends got used to this. When I graduated and found a steady full-time job, a lot of that subsided, but there was still tons of the partying. I would go out and drink at least 2-3 times a week. Anything less would be a disappointment. To whom? I don't know.
And then I started running...
About 4 years ago, after admiring my Uncle Bobby and cousins and my Dad (he ran when he was younger) for running local races and wishing that I could be a part of it, I let them convince me that I could do the same. I registered for the 2004 St Patty's Day 10k in DC and started to run with more regularity to get myself ready. To make a long story short (too late), it was nothing short of an amazing experience. I was hooked. Shortly after, I made it a goal to run a marathon. Not just any marathon. The Boston Marathon. So that fall I started training. It never occurred to me to limit bar time to better my training but, as a matter of course, I would skip a trip out here or there as a result of a long run or as a result of being tired. Over the course of 8 marathon training cycles prior to the present one, I have had varying degrees of social-ness. I've tried completely leading the lifestyle of my choosing and seeing how that affected my running. I've tried restricting myself as best I could from any sort of alcohol or staying out. And everything in between.
And I've caught varying degrees of shit from friends and family. Mostly I get "Dave, it's ok, we want you to achieve your goal." This is usually followed by 15 not-so-veiled quips about how it would be better if I broke my leg so that they could have their friend/sibling/cousin back. I have, in a sense, abandoned some very important people in my life. I am sure that this is how it seems to them. I am not sure how I feel about this opinion.
2004 Olympic Silver Medal Winner in the Marathon, Deena Kastor, once said (please pardon the slight paraphrase) "I don't believe in sacrifices. I don't make sacrifices. There are choices I have to make. I make those choices everyday. If I had to make sacrifices, there's no way I could do this for this long. I do what I love to do."
Training takes a lot of energy. I am regularly tired. I am regularly sore. I am regularly hobbled. I am regularly lazy. I go through patches during which I lose all motivation to be productive in any other way but running. I choose to run, though. I really do love it. It has given me so much. I have taken so much. And all it asks in return is patience and commitment. This time around, I really feel like I am starting to give it just that. It helps that my friends and family have been subjected to this 8 times before. I haven't really gone out at all since I started training. I have barely had a sip of anything with alcohol. But this time it's not because I'm consciously making a restriction on myself. Each time I have been confronted with the choice, I have made the decision against. Because I want to do well. Because I want to be able to do what it is that I love. And to do that, I know that it's an "either/or"... not a "both." I wake up every morning at 6 for my run because, in the summer, that is the coolest part of the 24-hour day. When I'm training, I need TONS of sleep every night. So that means being in bed by 9 or so. It seems that, at this time, most of my peoples are just settling in for a few hours of the tube and a snack before even thinking about bed. Or just getting ready to go out! But I know that, if I don't get all the sleep I need, I will either get sick or get injured... or both. Again, though, it's a choice. It doesn't feel like a sacrifice to go to bed that early.
There are repercussions, though. As I've already said, my relationships with my loved ones suffer. They are strained. Sometimes to the point of total estrangement. This is tough. But I have faith that the ones who really know me, who really care for me, know that it's not because of them, but rather, they understand that it's because I'm doing what I love. That I'm working towards my goal. That I'm working towards a source of happiness all the while reaping happiness from the journey. But even beyond those relationships that already exist in my world, I am deferring on those that could be. Next year, I will be 30 years old. THIRTY. 30. When my parents were thirty, they were married and had three kids. Both of my siblings are married with children. I am to the point in my life at which I am one of the only single people I know! When I was a teenager, I figured that, by 30, the only thoughts on my mind would be how I would be paying for my kids' college tuition and what I was gonna do once I retired. If running prohibits me from even maintaining the relationships I have with those I love - with whom everything is easy and comfortable- how in the world would I have energy to meet new people?! I haven't yet figured out the answer to that rhetorical question. Don't get me wrong. Sometimes I very much miss going out and getting blindly drunk, making poor decisions, and feeling horrible the next day. And, I know that I have missed out on some awesome events and games and parties. I have missed out on meeting some great people. On meeting people that might have one day been my lifelong companion. I don't know if I have really been making some choices that have prohibited me from other lifelong goals such as finding a wonderful woman with whom I can settle down and make beautiful pale babies.
But I don't think I have. I think things will come when they come. Right now, this is my focus. This is what brings me joy. It is healthy. It keeps me from unhealthy things. And I can only do this now. My body will only be young for so long. My mind will be with me until I'm gone. I know this is getting WAY too long to remain interesting. My apologies. Brevity is not my forte. I'll stop this one for now, but I would LOVE to hear your reactions, criticism, advice, arguments, compliments ;), or whatever else you'd like to say after reading this record of thoughts. You can use the "Comments" link below if you don't mind it being part of a discussion, or you can always email or IM/Txt me directly. Really, I would love to hear what you have to say.